HAPPINESS FROM THE PAST

We all grow up in discovery mode where we are in constant search for happiness. Every experience we have is new and teaches us a little more about ourselves.  No matter if its a good or bad experience it is still responsible for shaping us to be the person that we are today. Throughout life we discover interests that keeps us motivated and keeps us moving forward to strive for more, it is those things that we enjoy doing most that differentiate us from others. Sometimes our busy lifestyle modifys our priorities and leaves our basic interests on the bench. We try and justify our decision to deny our interests by choosing what we believe is more important and then using the over used excuse " I just don't have the time!" , but we forget that it is the little things in your life that keeps us sane. You may find the difficulties in your life become easier to handle when you allow yourself some breathing time where you could focus on yourself. If you brush aside the importance of the little things that put a smile on your face you'll probably find that with all the seriousness of the important things that take priority in your life that you will eventually find it harder to slow down and relax when you do have an oportunity to. So get back to your core and spend some time doing those things you grew up doing and have now made yourself feel like there is no place for it in your adult life.

CRAVE THE PURSUIT

While some people prefer to talk about their cravings as a hyperthetical, others make it their mission to do as much as they can do to reach their goals. Craving a certain type of lifestyle but putting little effort into trying to achieve that desired lifestyle highlights that some people crave the idea of the pursuit more than they do the actual journey. These people get rid of any potential opportunities by placing challenging hurdles strategically where they will have the desired affect of demotivating themselves  by confronting  a molehill and then their fear transforms it into a mountain of disappointment. The power of fear is enough to discourage them from pursuing their dreams because failure would be emminent in their eyes. So they may as well not risk losing what little they have to crave for and accept that they should be content with the bait that is waiving infront of their face of a potential hyperthetical pipe dream without the desire to pursue it. If you ask yourself, Why risk falling from the safety net for the chance of disappointment that may follow when the chance of success is not likely? You better answer swiftly "It's better to fail at something you crave than have nothing to crave for."

CHASING NOSTALGIA

 

We spend a lot of time trying reconnect to our past memories through nostalgia which the affects brings back those cherished memories that we hold dear to our heart. Reflecting on the memories from our past hoping for answers on how we've become the person we are today and remembering how innocent we used to be before life's ups and downs hardened our persona. Believing that the answers on who we are lies somewhere in our past, hoping that our past could give us an indication of what is yet to come if our lifestyle were to follow a set path. Sometimes we find resolute in our past memories because they remind us of our innocents as children, but as adults our memories are tainted by our current point of view. Looking at our past with an evolved mindset rather than the mindset of a child will make you feel that you should of made different choices that could of lead you to have more of things that you crave as an adult. Life is very different for kids everything is new and can be a little daunting, whereas adults we feel prepared because of our experiences which gives us the confidence that we could tackle any problem thrown at us. We would not be the adults that we are today if we weren't the kids that we were growing up. So stand and be proud of who you are and don't be hard on who you've become because it's the person you are today that has survived your ups and downs in life, that helps you in being persistent to strive further and never give up on yourself. 

DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER

Most people don't want to admit that they have some time or another judged a book by its cover when a new person has entered their social circle. We are guilty of making presumptions on the basis of probability, this tactic relys on patterns of behaviour which may ring true in most cases but is unfair to those who don't fit the mould and are put behind the 8 ball with no fault of their own actions. Self preservation is inbuilt in our basic instinct to protect us from harm or death. This survival instinct keeps us wary of the strangers that we haven't spent the time building a trusting relationship with all because the unknown makes us feel uncomfortable. Letting your guard down can leave you open for disappointment but it also waivers your chance to discover something new that could change your mind for the better. So don't let your wariness turn you off the people that can influence your mind to grow and become a better person. 

FULFILMENT ACHIEVED

Some people feel that they have to have a huge bucket list to feel that they are ambitious, while others are content with a simpler lifestyle and a smaller bucket list. Either way, we shouldn't compare one person's list to another person bucket list to measure whos is better. Peoples motivations vary and what might not make sense to one person is utterly logical to another person, your life your goals. It's not easy to understand why people do what they do but its also not anyone's job to navigate through the mind of someone else's interests. Setting goals and achieving them makes you feel that you are on track to completing your bucket list and this inturn will help you reach a happiness that will satisfy your desires. Whereas some feel the euphoria lasts long enough to keep them happy others are continuing craving the next best hit of self satisfaction through a list that seems to have no end. The more you crave the less you feel you have achieved, this is how I interpret the lyrics "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" in U2s hit song. Even though that song is about the search for spiritual fulfillment and the conflict between knowing that God exists and the desire for earthly things, I interpret it as a search for happiness through the expectations that we never meet. So use your time effectively because trying to figure out what you really want is the key to finding what you think you are looking for which may not be on a bucket list so achieve this before your time is up.

BAD ADVICE

We all differ in the amount of friends we have in our social circles but our friendship groups share alot of unique similarities. Our friendship groups consist of four categories: acquaintance, friend, close friend and best friend. As time passes your shared life experiences helps you strengthen your relationship bond with your friends because mutual respect is reciprocated. No matter the type of friend you have if their is an imbalance of respect resentment will build up and jealousy will take over leaving the non loyal friend to modify his or her behaviour by starting to give bad advice rather than the heart felt good advice you got used to. This will lead your disloyal friend down the pathway of resenting you and spending energy steering you on the wrong crooked path. So know who your true friends are and what their true motives are so that you won't wonder why they lead you down the garden path before you cant fix your bad choices.

CONSEQUENCES OF DOING

Consequences need to be concise and consistent if they were ever to be affective. If people aren't afraid of the consequences of their actions they will repeat the same mistakes over and over again. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity. Control and order go hand in hand and rely strongly on the consequences to maintain conditioning. People do the right thing because of the consequences they may be faced with,  they will either feel good when they be good or they may feel bad when the fail to be good. We all crave stimuli to feel alive which can either be positive or negative its a matter of perspective. Consequences sit in the middle between good and bad it leads you to the outcome that encourages you to reflect on your actions.  It is the consequences of our actions that remind us that what we did is the cause of where we are now, so taking responsibility of your choices will help you modify your behaviour to achieve a different result. We all like to believe that we are capable of being selfless but there is no such thing as a selfless act because anything you put out creates a feeling that comes back to you that influences your actions in either a positive or a negative way. Our basic human needs crave Certainty, variety, connection, growth, contribution and significance so what you might see as a selfless act with no intentions your subconscious has its own agenda for which you have not comprehended.

TRY TO BE CIVIL

Being polite seems a simpler enough task to achieve when your trying to follow the rules of good behaviour, but this becomes ever so challenging when unexpected hurdles are put in your way to hinder your behaviour. As you converse with small groups of people your intentions are finding common ground which is fairly easy to do but the the bigger the group that you converse with the harder you'll find to reach an equilibrium with others because through the diversity of people brings diversity in opinions. When you have a difference of beliefs your unpopular opinion will highlight you as an unacceptable person to converse with but should pleasing others be at the detriment of your own happiness. The more time you spend in a circle of people that deprive you of your opinions because they find them offensive the quicker you'll reach unhappiness and your freedom of speech will be ignored during controversial topics. So be civil and remember if we all had the same thoughts no one will learn anything new and conversation would be a little boring.

WOMEN AND MEN

We live in an era of inclusion transgender women compete in sports with biological women while some men and women dont see any problem with the inclusion others are disappointed with the amalgamation. I believe the line that separates women and men sports should be eradicated because it is discrimination that separates men and women sports and not any other justifiable reason for their separation. Maybe if we let time tell with the inclusion of men and women in competitive sports we will be reminded why the sexes of sports were separated and then it won't be a few woman complaining about the unfair advantage that a transgender woman has over a biological woman but it will bring more women to the table of how they feel and how they are affected by inclusion. This expierience might encourage them to decide to band together and stand up for their rights for fairness rather than worrying about the transgender rights to compete in competitive sports. Transgender athletes should compete with Transgender athletes if we expect equality. High level sports creates categories which may seem sexist or unfair but they are there to keep things fair by being equal.

EXPECTATIONS MET

Peoples expectations vary from one another, whether its a standard expectation with minimal output or high expectations that comes with a lot of responsibility some people want more out of certain people and settle for less from others. This may work on the short term basis but those who are expected to do more eventually will fill like they are being taken advantage of and will break ties looking for a little appreciation from another source. This takes away an integral part of the relationship that relied solely on one person to take the reins of leadership and left others hitching an easy ride with little contribution. There is no gain in focusing on the short term benefits if you consider the long term affects being detriment to the relationship. Just because something hasn't happened yet it doesn't mean it's not a problem, it is your responsibility to deal with the possible problems before they take affect so you are able to asess and choose the better outcome. Everyone has a different threshold that once crossed their is no remedy. So treat everyone the same as if they were in the same boat otherwise the ones that are responsible for more will be searching for a raft off the boat looking for something that meets their expectations.