WAITING FOR A REACTION

We strive for recognition. Without it, we feel ignored and alone. It is this fear of failure not to be seen that pushes us to amplify our own responses so that we are not overlooked. Our efforts are designed to either show others our worth or there to prove to ourselves that we do have a purpose. Our desire to prove our worthiness to our worst critique ourselves outweighs any need to appease those who are our peers because we are unforgiving to ourselves but overly fair to our peers. The negative side of us tries to put fear in us to convince us that we are not worthy so that it can control us by keeping our motivations at bay. Without any motivation in our lives, we will remain where we lie, not striving for more. It is human nature that encourages us to chase the things that we want in life and not to give up at the first sign of a problem. Fear uses the fear of failure as a deterrent so that we never try, but not trying is the biggest form of failure. There is peace of mind that comes to you when you know that you have lived a life without regret and knowing that you put your heart and soul into your endeavours is enough to save you the qualms if you didn't trust yourself enough to even try. So try and keep on trying until you have nothing left in you because at least you will know that you have given it your best. 

KNOW THYSELF

We may have the ability to limit the amount of bad things that happen in our lives, but no amount of planning ahead can prevent all the bad things from happening to us. Murphy's Law claims that if anything can go wrong, then the chances are that it will go wrong. This is why when the shit eventually hits the fan, how we tend to deal with the tough times is what determines the type of person that we have grown into. It is those moulding experiences that teachers us who we really are because it is only through those harsh times that we face that pushes us to our limits and at the same time strengthens us for the ongoing struggles that life deals us. That is why we are the only ones who could fully understand our weaknesses and our strengths because we have learned through our lifes struggles to work out who we are and what is best for us. Throughout our life we are told what we should be doing instead of what we have chosen to do because people believe that they know what is the better path for us even though their views are tainted by their own personal interests. So if you want to give advice to guide someone during troublesome times make it relevant to the persons interests not your own otherwise if they choose to follow your advice be aware you'll hear the end of it when the shit hits the fan.

OTHER RULES FOR YOU

Rules are meant to be held in high regard because they are the principles that govern our society. Without rules to help guide us from what is acceptable to what is not, people would rely on what is acceptable for them with little regard for others. We all have our own moral compass to guide us, but not all peoples moral compasses are equal. The world is made up of people who are givers and those that are takers, and not all takers have limits to what they'll take, especially from the givers who feel bad if they are not giving. Rules aren't designed to be perfect they are there purely as terms that you must follow if you expect to be part of a society and reap from the benefits of that society otherwise your actions against the terms that are put in place will incur consequences. We all have the power to choose the direction of where we go, if we don't like the rules that society puts out there then we can live like hermits and break the shackles of that society by living alone where we don't need to appease any laws. We can't expect to be in a functioning society and have the mindset that rules for me a different to the rules for others otherwise when reality hits so does the realisation that we are just like everyone else and not as special as we thought. So if you would rather be connected with reality and be a rational person not a selfish hypocrite then follow the rules that we all have to follow so that you don't get slapped  in the face with the consequences of breaking them.

PRONE TO REPEAT

The problems you see ahead may be obvious, but that doesn't mean that you will choose to change your path. We like to think that if we recognise the dangers ahead that we won't fall in the pitfalls that they bring, but it doesn't matter how prepared that we think we are because our over confidence will be our downfall. What makes us prone to repeat our mistakes is our inability to accept things for what they are. We like to believe that with the right thought process, we can do anything, but we are limited by our own circumstances. As much as we like to believe that we have full control of our lives, we can not control all the conditions in our lives. Our strength is in our ability to recognise good decisions over bad ones. If we ignore our intuition to make the right choices, then all that is waiting for us is a pathway that is full of misfortunes. If we think back over our mistakes, we will be able to recognise where we went wrong. So stop believing that you are infallible and start listening to your intuition so you can break the patterns of disappointment.

PAIN FULL OF AUDIENCE

Most people have experienced pain in their lives, but how they react to that pain can vary depending on their audience. When pain hits you and you are alone, you take it in and deal with it the best way that you can. This intrinsic response changes the moment someone else enters the room. Even though you are quietly managing your pain, your threshold for pain declines when your audience has their eyes on you. This overreaction gets the observer to transform into a carer, and now, with their focus solely on you, their newfound objective is what they can do to make you feel better. When we were kids and we fell down and scraped our knees our parents would either cuddle us with the intention of making us feel safe or they helped us by picking us up dusting us off and then encouraged us to keep on playing. Even though both decisions are made with good intentions, the decision to give more attention than what is required will only encourage bad behaviour. We are all product of conditioning it is human nature to recognise patterns in behaviour and if we notice that a little overreacting gets us what we deem is the right kind of attention then we will play on it. So if you don't want to fall for the drama then change the way you react to it and wait for the next episode that seems to come on a heightened level even though there is no urgency for it.

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When we are alone, we are only judged by our own expectations, whereas when we are in a group, we allow ourselves to be placed under a microscope so that we can be compared to the majorities expectations. Being alone gives us time to delve deep into our own needs without having to consider what the room thinks. Most people dont find it easy to remain true to their opinions when they are surrounded by a group of people who would disagree with their claims. This is why alot of people keep quiet when their opinions aren't mirrored by the majority and would rather choose to make alot of noise when they want to show their support with the majority even if their true opinions don't align with the crowd. The power of the audience is enough to steer the emotions of the crowd pleasers with a simple glance because when eyes are on your movements most people choose to blend in with the crowd rather than stand up for what they truly believe in. Our fear of rejection from our peers outweighs our desire to speak up, so maybe we should stand up for our beliefs and then walk away from those who would never listen to anyone else's opinion that differs from their own. Those who refuse to listen will only ever hold you back from moving forward because not everyone will ever share your perspective and no matter the effort that you put in they are content with  where they are in their life. So we should keep in mind that you can only help those who request it and leave those who live by the philosophy that ignorance is bliss to themselves. 

LONELINESS WHEN YOUR NOT ALONE

Loneliness can hit you even when your not alone, it doesn't matter if you are surrounded by people or not because the more people that you are around the more likely that you'll find yourself struggling to relate with the crowd. Disconnecting with a sizeable crowd will only magnify your feelings of loneliness, which will take you further and further away from others and keep you stuck into your own isolation. When we can not connect with our peers, isolation dominates our thoughts and makes us feel that our chances for getting help are hopeless, which results in us feeling lost and alone far away from anyones helping hand. While we try to help those that are in need by using the tactics that lift us up when we are feeling down our efforts to help others are a healthy reminder what to do if lonliness were to strike us. So help those in need and master your own abilities to get yourself out of the rut when the tough times strike you so that you don't have to be alone feeling the loneliness that comes without warning.

MY WORD IS MY BOND, UNTIL ITS NOT

Our word is what represents our character, and our character reflects the type of personality that we have. So whether we claim to have high morals and ethical values without any action to support our claims, then our words mean nothing. If you are not a person of your word but only a person of your current scenario then how is someone supposed to take you at your word when it is more likely change in order to suit your current situation. Only those who have blind loyalty will see your words as true because their support isn't based on your actions but merely on what you claim to believe in. Even though this charade may work successfully in the beginning, eventually , the loyal will get tired of defending any contradictions that start to show up. So whether you'd prefer to drag out the lies of who you claim to be for as long as you can get away with it, it is in your best interests that you remember that your character depth stays with you and those who you have affected. We are more than our words. We are our actions, so choose carefully how you act because that is how you will always be remembered. 

NICE TO BAIT YOU

In order for someone to bait you, they have to first have gained your trust by being nice to you, for that you will never listen to anyone that you didn't trust. Trusting the wrong person will result in you putting your foot in the trap that they have carefully laid out for you and then leaving you scratching your head wondering how were you so stupid to trust the wrong person. Trust is the key that turns your defences down, but logical thought should never be switched off even when you trust someone completely because trust doesn't change bad advice to good advice. It is our instincts that protect us. All we need to do is trust ourselves enough to recognise that we are being led astray. Those who encourage us to do the things that are not in our nature to do will use our trust in them to manipulate us. Whereas those who have our best interests in heart are genuinely interested in elevating us with our own wants even when they have nothing to benefit from the outcome. So keep your logical brain in charge of your choices and not the trust that you've more than likely given far too easily.

THE HARD WAY

It is human nature that when we see someone struggling in life that we try to help them out if it is in our power to do so. Even though by involving ourselves into someone else's struggles that it is more than likely that our  emotional involvement will add stress to our own lifestyle because you can't get involved in someone else's issues without empathising with their current situation. Our intentions may be honourable, but that doesn't mean that the ones that we are trying to advise see our words for what they are, guidance to what could possibly be a better alternative. To those that we are trying to advise all they see is us telling them what to do as if we are announcing that we can do better than them and that they are failing at their attempts to tackle life's problems. This blind assumption leads them to disregard any of your advice and tarnishes any valid points that you are making. Their emotional state heightens their built-up frustrations, which directs them to disregard any of your opinions and results in them doing the opposite to whatever you have suggested. Avoiding your suggestions puts them on the same path that they have always found themselves on, better known as the hard way. It takes a high level of maturity to separate the advice given from the person who is giving it, this is because people stop listening to the words when they are tied to an authority figure. The prejudice that is placed on the who is giving the advice will only affect the one who needs another perspective. So if you want a different story to the one you keep on repeating then flip the page to a path that isn't so predictable and allow yourself to listen before you make any harsh judgements that could remove any good advice from your life.